A Most Unfortunate Profession

Never declare that you're a doctor when travelling by air.
Apparently, if there is an emergency and you are called upon, if you fail to perform admirably, possibly due to the free scotch or the fact that you are jetlagged to shit, you can get sued.

"We heard about that doctor on a plane 'oo stopped sumwun from dyin' of a collapsed lung wiv a friggin' coat 'anger! My 'Arry went dahn wiv a nasty ingrowin' toenail arfway to Benidorm, and vat bastard didn't even ave a coat 'anger. 'S medical negligence, innit?"

But what happens if 'Arry is calling out with pain halfway through the in-flight movie, and your spouse is incredibly proud of the fact that you're a doctor?

"Coo-eee, Miss Hostess? My husband/wife is a doctor!" they might wave, beaming.

Damned embarrassing, what?

I don't watch much TV at the moment (see Gap Project, The) but I was channel hopping over one of those horrific reality TV shows set in an airport last night, and I was watching long enough only to realise that it was one of those horrific reality TV shows set in an airport, and also to hear a complaining woman ask a question over the inquiry desk.

"What kind of technical difficulty is causing the delay? Only my husband is an engineer, you see-"

I channel hopped again, never to return to that particular show.

In the past, I have been asked to fix, amongst other things;

Televisions
Washing machines
Hairdryers
A tumble dryer,
Computers
Cars
An industrial lathe
A record player
A toaster
Plumbing for a sink
A shower
A PDA
Mobile phones
A hamster cage.

...with limited success, mostly achieved through luck, it has to be said.

Which only goes to show.

Never tell anyone what you do for a living, not even the people you work for.